Making Science More Interesting

I always thought science was pretty interesting when I was a kid, but Japan has come up with a way to make young people even more interested in science: Portraying famous historical scientists as sexy young men (and the occasional woman) with the "Visual Scientists" encyclopedia.


Written and edited by the "International Sexy Science Study Group" this book aims to introduce science and those scientists who have made major impacts throughout history in a way that will get young people excited about learning. In addition to short bios on major scientists, several different fields of science are represented with "cute figures." For example (left to right) Classical Mechanics, Botany, and Electromagnetism.

This pull-out seems to be of two young men performing a "Chemistry" experiment...

Most well-known scientists are represented, including:

Isaac Newton

Albert Einstein

Ben Franklin

In addition to mentioning many other scientists, there is a section examining famous fictional scientists, like Emmett Brown--"Doc" from "Back to the Future," Victor Frankenstein, and Yoda. There is also a section about modern-day scientists who are doing great things in our time, the majority of who, surprisingly, are Japanese, including Kodo Okuyama--the man who "liberated the Japanese people from eyeglasses." (No, he did not invent lasic eye surgery, he studied it in the former Soviet Union and was the first to perform it in Japan...Meanwhile, there is no mention of the actual inventor of the surgery, but obviously he isn't as important as the Japanese guy who copied him.)

All in all, this "encyclopedia" contains just enough information to give one the gist of who each scientist is without boring one with too many pesky dates or details and provides enough eye-candy to keep a young person's attention span long enough to finish reading it. I give it an A+ for ingenuity. Other offerings by the same publisher include:

"Element Girls"--to help you memorize the periodic table

And "Astro Girls"--to teach the basics of Astronomy

Kawasaki Halloween Adventures

So, I ended up not staying for Rocky Horror Picture Show, but I did go to the Halloween parade in Kawasaki on the 31st. I got there right before it started, so couldn't get a really good spot, but was able to take some video:

As you can see, there were three floats in the parade.

Float 1 started the parade and carried the special guests, the comedy duo "Maeda Maeda." They are elementary school aged brothers who, while not really that funny, are absolutely adorable. Float 1 = Cutest Float

Float 2 was really awesome because of all the spooky arms sticking out of it and because the DJ was spinning "Thriller." Float 2 = Most Appropriate for Halloween Float

Float 3 was pretty ridiculous because it consisted of the not-creatively costumed skanky belly dancers and skanky angel dancing to "Barbie Girl." Float 3 = Most Appropriate for Japanese Halloween Float

The others in the parade are just normal people who signed up to participate. A lot of them had some really great costumes (many of which not pictured here since I only got 1/3 of them), but there were still quite a few store-bought witch costumes and the like. But, that's what you get with non-juried parade selection, I guess.

Right before leaving, we stumbled across a street performer, who seemed to have absolutely nothing to do with Halloween. I couldn't tell if he was kinda creepy, or really awesome...probably a combination of both...you be the judge. (Commentary courtesy me and my friend Errol)

Apartment Tour!

I know some people have been waiting a long time to see my apartment since I moved, but I wanted to wait until I had all of my furniture. Now, after I've been living here for a little more than a year, I finally have everything the way I want it. So, here it is, the long awaited tour:

False Advertising

**Visa update**
Got the postcard telling me to go in to the immigration office on Monday to find out my "results," went in on Tuesday, and it turns out...I got it!! And a three-year, no less! So, I'm good until 2012. The whole process was surprisingly fast, though: Gave them my application on Monday, Oct. 5th--Received phone call from them telling me I had to earn more money from Japanese companies (foreign companies don't count b/c you "don't need to live in Japan" to work for them "even if you pay the Japanese government taxes from that income") on Friday, Oct. 9th--Sent in more "invoices" for "private English students" in Japan on Tuesday, Oct. 13--Received post card stating that my results were ready on Monday, Oct. 19 (though the postal date stamp was Friday the 16th). So, the decision about my visa only took two weeks, even though they told me I had to mail them more information, and they say it usually takes three to four weeks...So, did they actually look at the other information I sent them? Were they going to give me the visa all along, but the guy who called just wanted to hassle me and, as my friend said, "create red tape because there wasn't any already"? I guess we'll never know...but who cares, because I got my visa!!!

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In other news, I went to my favorite food-themed amusement park, Namja Town, the other day. They were having an event called "Dessert Panic Carnival," so various dessert vendors were offering strange looking/tasting desserts. I really wanted to try the "Dracula Cream puff," which was black on the outside and filled with bright red, spicy cherry-flavored filling. However, they were out...So I went for my second choice: a crepe filled with a bunch of different flavored gelatin hearts, including ones that are super spicy or sour, so it is like gelatin roulette because you never know what you are going to get.

It cost 680yen, which is more expensive than a normal crepe, but this is what I was expecting:

A crepe filled to the top with colorful gelatin!
When I ordered it, the girl seemed reluctant to make it, saying "there are sweet, spicy, and sour flavors, so it isn't really that tasty..." "That's fine," I replied, since I had read the description on the sign for "dessert panic" and that is why I wanted it. Do they actually expect people to not order it? She then proceeded to make a crepe, and COMPLETELY FILL IT with whipped cream...Then she folded it up, went in back, and emerged with this:

A whipped cream crepe topped with a mere four gelatin hearts...You can imagine my disappointment.

I suppose it wasn't technically false advertising, because they never said "there are more than four pieces of gelatin in this crepe," but I don't think a bunch of whipped cream and a little bit of Jell-o is worth almost $7.00...Especially when what I really wanted was a Dracula Cream puff...

Are you serious, Japan?

I've been really busy/stressed out lately because I have been having issues trying to renew my visa, which expires in less than a month. I won't get into it here because it's a long story, and I have already told it so many times I am sick of it. Instead of that, here are some more examples of why Japan has no idea what it is doing half the time.

Because I am enrolled in the nationalized government health care plan (though that is not crazy, eh-hem, America, eh-hem), I received an educational pamphlet in the mail pertaining to a couple of important health issues from the city of Kawasaki (where I live). The first section was about avoiding "metabolic syndrome," which I first heard about 2 years ago when I moved here. It is an actual medical condition that affects 1 in 5 people, many of who are overweight or obese. However, not all overweight people have it and normal weight people can have it as well. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metabolic_syndrome)

Japan, however, has taken to shortening the term to "Metabo" and using it to refer anyone who is overweight or has been gaining weight. Some examples of this usage that I have actually heard include, "Recently, I've gotten metabo" and, "Oh, you are metabo" (said to a portly, non-Japanese gentleman while the speaker patted his stomach).

As you can see from the photo above, the pamphlet from the Kawasaki City health care department decided frogs were a good mascot for Metabo prevention. To be fair, the pamphlet itself does describe what metabolic syndrome is using the accurate medical definition. But the ways to prevent it, including eating a healthy, balanced diet and getting plenty of exercise, are the same things all doctors everywhere have always been telling people to do if they want to lose weight. So, it really seems like the health care marketing department is using the catchphrase "metabo" to get people to eat healthier and lose weight. That's just fine, but I'm pretty sure the people out there who, because they're not be prone to gain weight genetically or who eat less than their daily allotment of calories, but eat it all in cake and soda, so that they stay thin think they are in no danger of metabolic syndrome and are not going to be paying attention because they are not "fat." So, nice try, but ultimately: FAIL.

The second half of the pamphlet was about the understanding and prevention of AIDS. They included information about the ways AIDS can and cannot be spread (i.e. the stuff they taught us in kindergarten like, "you can't get AIDS from hugging someone with AIDS"), which I'm pretty sure most Japanese people have never been told before. And also includes a list of locations where you can go to get a free AIDS test and counselling (way to go Kawasaki!). All in all a very good resource full of information that everyone should be aware of. Unfortunately, there is one little problem:

The title of this section is "Learn about AIDS with a Dolphin." Yes, the one teaching us about AIDS is a cheerful dolphin, jumping through a red ribbon. Seriously? Is anyone going to pay attention to this now? If they are out of elementary school, I think not. FAIL

In conclusion, from this pamphlet I have learned that the Kawasaki health care department is really great, but the Kawasaki health care department's person in charge of marketing is either a grade-schooler or is mildly mentally handicapped. Maybe they hired Ex-President Dubya?

Considering the season I would also like to mention Halloween. I think I have talked about how Japanese people like to dress up as "Halloween" by wearing as much orange and black crap that they can fit on their person, or simply put on cat ears/witches hat/devil horns. This is actually understandable, considering that Halloween is so new to Japan and the people that are dressing up never experienced it as kids, so they don't really know how to make/wear a costume. In Kawasaki, however, they go nuts for Halloween (I heard they are even making a run for Halloween capitol of Japan) and have been hosting a "Halloween Village" around Kawasaki station for 13 years running. I have never actually gone, but hope to this year to see a screening of "Rocky Horror Picture Show." I've heard that the costume parade is great, because people actually go all out and put a lot of effort into making creative and impressive costumes. They also have events for kids and adults so it seems like fun for the whole family. However, after seeing the following video of a dance and song that kids must learn in order to participate in a mass Halloween dance-off on November 1st (wait, what?), I think they still do not quite understanding what Halloween is about:

http://lacittadella.co.jp/halloween/s_movie/oyugi.html

A translation of the lyrics to "Everybody Come to Kawasaki Halloween" (which were apparently written by a 7 year old):

Halloween! (Clap your hands everybody)

Hallo-Hallo, Halloween, Kawa-Hallo

Hallo-Hallo, Halloween, sparkle-sparkle (Yah!)

A skeleton in a cobweb hat, Snaps and cracks in a fun rhythm

Be wild in black and white, Let's go to this thrilling night!

Hallo-Hallo, Halloween, Kawa-Hallo

Hallo-Hallo, Halloween, sparkle-sparkle

A black cat with wide eyes, Meow-Meows in a stylish rhthym!

Be cute in purple and orange, Let's go to this exciting night!

Happy Hallo-Hallo, Kawa-Hallo, Everybody come to Kawasaki

Halloween

Hallo-Hallo, Halloween, Kawa-Hallo

Hallo-Hallo, Halloween, sparkle-sparkle

Hallo-Hallo Halloween Kawa-Hallo

A black bat will show you the way

Hallo-Hallo Halloween Kawa-Hallo

The Jack-o-lanterns are calling you too

Hallo-Hallo Halloween Kawa-Hallo

Everyone come to Kawasaki Halloween

Everyone gather, Kawasaki Halloween!

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Yikes, at least when I was a kid we Halloween dance-offed to the Monster Mash.

To answer the questions this song has undoubtedly raised:

1. Yes, those costumes are what I was talking about--dressed as Halloween.

2. If you didn't already figure it out, Kawa-Hallo is a combination of the words "Kawasaki" and "Halloween." Japan love combining words like that.

3. Japan seems to think that purple is a Halloween color just as much as orange is; is it they way they clash so beautifully with each other? I don't know.

Anyway, that's all for now. Wish me luck with my visa...of course if I can't get one and have to move back to the US, I will have a lot more time to blog...though I won't have anything interesting to write about.

Long Awaited Update

So, I was in North America (MN, WI, Toronto, LA) for a month from the end of June to the end of July. I had a great time visiting family and friends, many of who I hadn't seen for 2 years! But, since this blog is supposed to be about my life in Japan, I won't go into details here. Interested parties can see pictures of my trip on Facebook. Also, while I was visiting, I got yelled at by many people for not updated this blog enough...whine, whine, whine...so, here you go, I hope you are happy knowing that I am sitting in front of my heat-spewing computer in the middle of muggy Japanese summer with nothing by a mini-fan to cool off, sweating to bring you this post.

I haven't been doing too much since I've been back...catching up on work, going to the beach for body surfing and sun burns, and hanging out with friend. One highlight from the other day: I inadvertently found a new way to kill cockroaches--death by washing machine! I don't know it got in there on its own, or was in the pile of clothes I put in or if it was dead or alive at the time I started the machine, all I know is that as I was hanging my laundry I found the decapitated head and then later the body, some legs, bits of wing...you get the disgusting picture. I wouldn't recommend trying it at home, unless you have really good vomit control.

After that exciting adventure, I found something awesome in the convenience store: US "street" themed Pringles! The one I got was "LA Street--BBQ Chicken," which was delicious BTW. Other flavors include "NY Street--Cheese Dog" and, breaking with the "street" theme, "American Flavor--Hamburger."

Why didn't I spend my time in LA rollerblading around eating BBQ chicken wraps!? Next time... The girl on the can's speech bubble says "limited time only!" Hooray!

So that's pretty much all the interesting things as of late...Oh, but check out this really cool blog I found, definitely worth following: http://penispants-in-nihon.blogspot.com/

The Glorious Nation of Penispants

Continuing my trend of updating about once per month...I swear I will try to do better, OK Mom?

Those who know me, know that I always enjoy coming up with new and funnier ways to make people laugh (AKA mess with people and laugh at them, knowing that, if they were in on the joke, they'd be laughing too.)

Recently, I have created an on-going gag that, I humbly believe, tops anything else I have ever said. I'm talking, of course, about my home country, the Glorious Nation of Penispants.

Let me start by explaining how I created this gag:

In February, some friends and I went to the annual sake festival in Niigata. We had such a blast last year that we wanted to go again. Based on last years experience, however, we knew that this event, which is basically a 2-day-all-you-can-drink-sake-for-$20 booze extravaganza, is rife with old, drunken Japanese men who like to try to talk to foreigners, sometimes very close to our faces, in mostly incoherent Engrish. In order to dissuade these chatty Cathies, I decided that, since we were all wearing funny hats and mine had cat ears, whenever a drunkard asked, "Where you from?" I would simply reply, "I'm a cat!" in English and refuse to say anything else. This worked quite well for a while, causing people to first become confused ("What is Cats?") and then losing interest and leaving me alone. Then, I met a drunken old man who just wouldn't take "I'm a cat!" for an answer. Inspiration struck and this conversation ensued:

Drunken Old Japanese Man: Where you from?
Me: Penis
DOJM: Peeniisu?
My Friend: Like in your pants?
DOJM: ??
Me: Yes, Penispants. (In Japanese) I'm from Penispants.
DOJM: I don't know Penispants.
Me: It's an Eastern European country that was formed when the Soviet block collapsed.
DOJM: Ohhhhhh. I've never heard of it before.
Me: Yeah, most people haven't--its a really small country. But if you google it, you can find a map easily.
DOJM: OK, here, could you write the name down for me? I want to look it up went I get home!

And thus, the Glorious Nation of Penispants was born. It works so well because nobody knows all of those ex-soviet countries-- I mean, I'm pretty sure Romania has never even heard of the Republic of Moldova. I can only imagine what that guy thought went he did a google search...(find out the google results for yourself here: http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=navclient&ie=UTF-8&rlz=1T4SNYI_enJP307JP307&q=penispants )

After that, my friends all got in on the game, too. We spoke only Japanese and Penitspansian, so we had the perfect excuse not to speak to people in English. We met a lot more people who were super excited to meet people from a real Eastern European country, hear us speak our native language, and even sing a traditional Penispants drinking song. We even fooled a group of American frat-boys who spoke no Japanese OR Penispantsian, but did want to take their picture with us.

After the sake festival, I have been telling people I am from Penispants on a number of other occasions, such as at "hanami" (traditional Japanese cherry blossom viewing party AKA the nation of Japan's excuse to get drunk and loud outside). My new nationality also came in extremely handing when a couple of Christian missionaries came to the door. Normally, if you tell them you can't speak Japanese, they still don't go away--they just open up their list of languages they have pamphlets in--but, unfortunately for them, Penispantsian was NOT on their list. Interestingly, when I told them I was from an Eastern European country, they assumed I must be a mail-order bride--but went I told them that I'm not married and am here for work, I'm pretty sure they thought that I'm a hostess/prostitute. At any rate, they haven't been back since, so FYI feel free to use the Penispants excuse when those types come to call.

Unemployed in Japan

So, since I lost my job-- due to the "current economic situation"-- you would think I would have a lot of time to update my blog. While that may be true...I have a lot less interesting things to blog about...

So, because I was paying unemploymet insurance at my last job, I am eligible to receive money from the government for 90 days, or until I find a new job. In order to get it though, I have to jump through a bunch of hoops at the unemploymet office. But, since I am not working, I really have nothing better to do, so I'm not complaining. Especially since the Japanese unemployment office is, like everything else here, just a little bit ridiculous.

First off, the actual, official name of the Japanese government-run unemployment office is "Hello Work." And that is NOT a translation, they write it in katakana, but that is what the say in Japanese too, "harou waaku." Yes, it is like if the unemployment office in the US were called "Hola Trabajo."

Also, FYI, if you do not read, write, and speak Japanese, DO NOT lose your job in Japan. They have absolutely zero support in English. Not on the website, in the information booklets, or God-forbid from the people that work there. There weren't even English (or any other) subtitles on the information video everyone had to watch, even though they did have a Japanese sign-language interpreter in a little bubble on the bottom of the screen. This is especially important since recently many of the construction/factory workers who are immigrants from South America, Asia, etc. are losing there jobs, and though they may speak Japanese, the literacy rate isn't super high. Hey, maybe I can suggest to them that they need to get everything translated and should hire me to do it!

Anyway, a week after filing the paper work to declare unemployment, I had to attend a 2-hour long information session that included a poorly designed power-point, a ridiculous instructional video, and an explaination of the unemployment instruction book we received. Basically what I learned was that in order to get a new job, I first need to decide that I want a new job, and should then write a resume that lists my experiences, and then send that resume to apply to open positions that I am interested in. Oh, also if you tell a prospective employer that you are just planning to find a husband and quit your job to be a housewife as soon as you possibly can, you may have a difficult time getting hired.

Also, in order to receive the unemployment benefits you must prove that, yes, you are still unemployed and that you are actively looking for work. The latter can be shown by doing things like attending a resume writting session, job seminar, applying to a position through the Hello Work system, going to a job interview, etc. Things like looking at a newspaper or the internet to find a job do not count. (you need to do at least 2 things per month) Well, I only apply to jobs on the internet...so I was a bit panicked. However, when I asked the presenter about it afterwards and explained that I had already applied to some jobs online but was not contacted for an interview, he assured me that as long as you apply and don't literally just "look" at internet job listings that is fine...so really no actual proof is needed other than me writing down "I applied for xxx job on xxx date." In other words, you would have to be a complete idiot to not write down that you applied for a job even if you did only look at the internet, and in that case you probably are not going to be hired anytime soon so you really do need that unemployment money.

Also, if you do work at all while you are receiving unemployment you MUST declare how much and when, because you can not receive the daily allowance for that day. And you MUST NOT fail to declare ANY work you do or misrepresent how much you earned because, "everything you do is tracked by the Hello Work computers and if you write down anything false, it will be easily found out." Yeah...those all- powerful, all-knowing computers are gonna get me...unless....I get paid in...C-A-S-H!